STAPLE! The Independent Media Expo 2008

Hi, I know you guys can help me, I need some waterproof underwater staples for my Mini Comix which i’m going to sell to the underwater fish of the North Atlantic, but I need special corrosion resistant staples, does anyone know where I cant get some?
Kind regards,
Mr Account Banker
Nigeria Secret Service!!!! doh :roll:

Hi Thing,
Thank you for your interesting question. While bronze-magnanese staples are a good choice for underwater comics, I find them prohibitively expensive, and, as it turns out, they [i:e8ddf34a15]will[/i:e8ddf34a15] begin to corrode after three or four hundred years in the sea.
Personally I’d reccommend a space age polymer such as polyurethane which has excellent waterproofing qualities, will never biodegrade and is much more affordable. I like to purchase it in large blocks which can then be heated to melting point and extruded through a common household cake decoration tools. This way, in addition to staples, you can adorn your mini-comics with a variety of fun shapes such as florettes, stars, ruffles, petals, scallops, leaves, strings, beads, stripes and of course basketweave. This will add flourish to your products and serve to entertain even those of your fishy audience who cannot read, and will last long after the paper has rotted away to molecules.
Hope that helps :D
Thanks for writing Just Ask StapleHead!

Thats totally cool, but i’m a bit worried that the fish will see through my cheap gimmick and just buy the other mini comics with nude girls on them. I now that little fish of the north Atlantic arn’t that shallow, especially some of the benthic dwellers, but its a fear and a worry thats constantly on my mind, plus I dont have and cake things that you mentions and my stocks of pulversised pvdf plastic pellets is a gooky green instead of the effervessent bronze manganese hue I was after.
All that aside, I am definatly intested in this staple show you have. Hey, guess what, I do one too, so I think we should join forces and have an underwater North Atlantic comics whatsit, it could be called the staplething. I have thousands of readers under water, most of them are in schools but it would totally rule if the event was 4 miles below sea level, we could build an underwater city, and have a speacial space shuttle service into outer space because its going to be soo big its sure to be visible from the moon and people can check it out and stuff. :shock:

Your mini-comics don’t have nude girls?!? Then that must’ve been pornography I was looking at.
I think “staplething” sounds like an awesome idea. The first completely submarine small-press comics convention! We could franchise it to other bodies of water as well like the South Pacific, Indian Ocean, Red Sea and Great Lakes. I like the name too, but I’m going to have to insist you start putting naked ladies in your books – otherwise what’s the point?!?